stone, seamus paul

[Deleted]

If there's anything life has taught me, it's that you should never settle for the first thing because there's a better thing coming. my mum told me this after my first girlfriend, Natasha, broke up with me for Lars Hilton.. that soccer player with the little prick. Well, she was right. Because Natasha got pregnant when she was fifteen and never quite recovered. I saw her a week ago while visiting home and that shit's tragic, straight up Winona Ryder from that one terrible film. Minus the becoming a decent writer. This isn't about girls, this is about choice of career. I've wanted to be a lawyer since my dad told me that's what I should be. I was five and had just been prescribed my first pair of glasses, the old man took a look at me and said, "Shamey boy, you look like a real lawyer." From then on I was pretty obsessed with the idea. I spent an entire Christmas break locked in the fucking basement watching Law & Order: SVU, and the entirety of 2001 quoting Liar Liar. "THE GOD DAMN PEN IS BLUE!" Besides a week where I strayed to wanting a pet detective (thanks Ace Ventura), I've always wanted to be a lawyer. My dad's a judge, so naturally he encouraged this. We were the best of bros, and that was thrilling for a while. I remember when I was fifteen I stole a bottle of scotch from the liquor cabinet, but I lawyered myself and Dominic was blamed (wasn't the first time, wasn't the last). That was when I decided Harvard school of law. But I didn't get into Harvard :c I got into Stanford. For four years of my life, I was stuck in California. Do you know how hard it is to wear clothes in dry heat? Difficult. Stanford wasn't that bad, I met my girlfriend Lila there. It was just bad enough to make me move to Columbia for law when I was twenty-two. Move away from Lila, move away from the sweaty cesspit, move away from the fake tans and the peroxide blondes. I forget if this had a point. Something about my first choice not being my last choice, something about plenty of fish in the sea, something about my use of repetition in meaningless conversation. Oh right, so I graduated early last spring. Passed the bar this past July. And now I'm a lawyer, that's what my resume says. Now that I'm a lawyer though, I feel myself not wanting to be a lawyer. The exhilaration of becoming a lawyer was far more exciting than actually being a lawyer. Originally, I wanted to work against the big corporations. You know, save the planet. I became a real gung-ho hippy in a suit. I was offered the job, then I was offered another job. When it came to paying rent and saving for the future, corporate won. But I have a plan b. Apple has allowed me to become a photographer, so there's that. ------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------- lila saunders .. break-up attempt #1 seventeen and two months into the relationship, Seamus Stone finds monogamy a struggle. attempts to end relationship by using the excuse, "I just really need to focus on school." To which Lila replies, "no." break-up attempt #2 sophomore year, their one year anniversary. Seamus forgets the significance of the day, does not make reservations or get a gift. Lila is distraught, breaks up with him. Seamus grovels, buys a ring with his savings, presents the ring as a "promise ring", the couple resolves. break-up attempt #3 At his brother's wedding. Both get belligerently drunk, Seamus brings to flirt with the maid of honour. Lila catches him and makes a scene. To which Seamus responds by screaming, "that's it, I'm done." Lila retorting, "oh no you don't." break-up attempt #4 Via Facebook, Seamus writes on her wall, "Hi Lila, tried to catch you on the phone but you mustn't have paid your bill. Look, I'm sorry to do it like this but I really don't think this is working for either of us. Are you happy? Because I'm not." To which Lila's best friend replies, "she is, and you're not breaking up." break-up attempt #5 Most recently, a drunken argument over the phone. Both broke up with each other, only to play telephone tag to try work things out.

ciara . chris . resident (coding @ rae)