; aguacero

[benicio otero]

Benicio That's why you always have to think of angry exes or brothers when you date a girl. Puerto Rican girls just hit different. Watch, visit eventually and you'll fall in love too. Then I'll see that girl Camille when I get back, I like her.

[stassi siminski]

s t a s lucky me, all sisters and weak af exes. i'm not sure i can set her up with playboy beni, i promised her a lovestruck sweetheart.

[benicio otero]

Benicio I don't know, you have a lot of crazy fans. Hmm I already wrote all the songs I could with that, it's out of my system. I'm cured.

[stassi siminski]

s t a s my fans are not crazy, they're more like my girlfriends! yours, however... rabid. sure jan.

[benicio otero]

Benicio No way, the TikTok army is worse. I'm not breaking anyone up, be proud of me there at least.

[stassi siminski]

s t a s they are very sweet to me. mostly. oh wow, is that a dig??

[benicio otero]

Benicio What do you think they would do if you told them to commit a crime for you? Nooo never. You know I've been rooting for you this whole time.

[stassi siminski]

s t a s depends on the crime, duh. i think maybe some minor arson wouldn't be out of the question. i'll forgive you because it's you.

[benicio otero]

Benicio You should have unleashed them on that bad ex. I think I've been a good friend and gave you good advice. You kind of got what you wanted, no?

[stassi siminski]

s t a s oh they got to him, his fiancee left him. you are a good friend. i guess so.

[benicio otero]

Benicio Did you celebrate? I mean I didn't think you'd actually do it, but it was still good. And now you have someone new, good job.

[stassi siminski]

s t a s no, he nuked my life by posting about me on reddit after that. it feels like you don't fully mean that.

[benicio otero]

Benicio Yeah Monica showed me when it happened. Crazy. I do! Tell me about him.

[stassi siminski]

s t a s thanks for not mentioning it, genuinely. noooooooooo. you won't tell me about your girls!

[benicio otero]

Benicio I was gonna tell you I know some guys in the Bronx if you wanted to pay him a visit. But you got the last laugh. What am I supposed to know besides their names and what they look like? I'm not calling them my girlfriends.