. silver lining

[freddie beaumont]

"Funny," he laughs when she adds not the help or British, being the type that she gravitated towards. Many of the words described the person he saw in the mirror ever day, himself. Freddie shifts so that his back is no longer leaning against the wooden railing that lined the balcony. It's funny that he finds himself out here, with Aisha. In the past, he'd spent many hungover mornings with Tate, or even sneaking away from any chaos from the various parties on these very grounds. It feels more mature..to be here with Aisha and speaking about such grown up things. But it was the reality of it all, as he looks to the small bump of her belly. "I guess so. I knew of your lunches together, but sounds like it's developed more if you're calling her by her nickname." Though the idea of them together scared him, it also brought a bit of ease to his life. Circumstances could've been much different, everyone angry or upset that Freddie was now fathering two of Aisha's children. His elbows touch the wooden railing now, leaning over it and looking out towards the yard. "You have no idea," he mutters through gritted teeth, sighing more of his frustration away, when she speaks on his need to explode. It wasn't just sexually. "But mostly when I saw you flirting with "the help" as you put it."

[aisha van buren]

Aisha briefly wonders how long it'll be before someone else comes home to disturb them. Tate was ruled out, spending the afternoon with Olivia and her parents, doing his best impression of a doting, respectable boyfriend. Daisy wasn't coming for another few days and she'd be staying at her own place, though that never stopped her from rocking up here whenever she felt like it. No, it would be Cora or Caesar to break the peace first, and Aisha can only hope that it's the former. "We have plenty in common. Like exasperation over you, for example." She looked out across the water, her heart rate increasing as she continued to weigh up everything he had said, trying to hold it in her mind it to ascertain its weight. It felt significant. "Maybe you should see a sex worker. Oh wait, you took one to lunch." Old habits died hard. "You have to let that go. It's insane to think I'd ever go there with an employee, much less Charlotte's sloppy seconds."

[freddie beaumont]

Freddie keeps his elbows on the wooden rails, tanned arms crossing as he looks out to the ocean. The peace between them felt nice, even if it was only ever short lived. What Aisha didn’t know was that he loved their back and forth banter, the ups and downs. The last few months had been torture for him though. They were barely speaking, the Aria exchanges were awkward and filled with tension. “My mother probably likes you more than me now.” Freddie was confident that his mother enjoyed her newfound relationship with Aisha. His back grows tired from leaning and he’s standing up straight now, watching her glance towards the water. “Why have you been so different with me?” He questions, still keeping his blues eyes pierced on her. It’d been obvious that feelings were hurt over his omission of the truth about Jane, then he rubbed more salt into the wound with her appearance in Cabo. “I’m clearly not good at any of this stuff, but I am trying. I want to try.” Words having two meanings that he hopes she picks up on.

[aisha van buren]

A different version of the summer unfurls before her, one she had not allowed herself to consider. Too furious about the rumours that swirled around him, too hurt by the lack of acknowledgement of the first mother's day as co-parents, too afraid to open herself up to more of the same to even begin to think of how things could be different. "I'm very likeable," she says, genuinely unaware of quite how untrue that statement was. Freddie straightens up and she's forgotten quite how tall he is, how imposing, after so many instances of her barely looking at him, him stooping to Aria whenever she did. He looks like a model and she wants to punch him for it. She considers his question, bristling at its directness. Before she can answer he's followed it up, and though the words are plain the double meaning is less so, there but open to misinterpretation. She takes a moment to decide how to respond, quelling her own wrath before it can rise. Instead of answering she counters with a question of her own. "Why?" She finally looks back at him, giving him the direct eye contact she had been avoiding for so long. "Why won't you just give up?"

[freddie beaumont]

He feels a snort slip from the back of his throat as Aisha calls herself likable. It was one of the qualities he did liked about her, her ability to be blunt and honest when others couldn't do the same. Leaving many enemies in her wake. A little bit selfish? Definitely, but the princess power treatment did something for him when it came from her. The hope he was feeling dwindles as he sees the recognition on her face. She's thinking his questions over. His heart was pounding as he listens to all of their surroundings. The distant sounds of the waves hitting the shore, Aria's squealing through the glass. Freddie feels as though he's waiting a lifetime to hear some honest words or feelings from her. Instead she follows his with a question of her own, finally making the direct eye contact he didn't realize he'd been craving from her. "I don't want to give up." He doesn't have to mull over the question, giving her an answer immediately. "Do you want me to give up? Honest answers only."

[aisha van buren]

Shockingly, it's only in this moment that Aisha realizes she may have been unfair on him. She had gotten pregnant with Aria so soon after her breakup with Joe that she had never really processed either, something that made it difficult for her to find space for Freddie in her thoughts. After all, she had let him miss the first year of his daughter's life, and for the first time ever she feels guilty about that. Finally she looks at him and sees Freddie, her Freddie, not the Freddie Beaumont whose name was blue on Wikipedia. She was so used to pushing people away that she'd just done it to him too, a habit, and then she hadn't known what to do when he kept coming back. For once in her life, she feels something akin to gratitude, something inside her unfurling and reaching out to him. Embarrassingly she can feel the sting of tears in her eyes and she looks away, trying to wipe them away as surreptitiously as she can. Finally she shakes her head, still not able to look at him. "No. I really, really don't want you to give up."

[freddie beaumont]

They go back and forth between maintaining eye contact, and then Aisha refusing to look at him. Freddie never strays though, keeping his eyes glued to her every word and action. As if he's hanging onto every little thing. He hates that she's brought out this desperate side to him. It'd been a recent thing that he'd chalked up to being celibate. Until the antics with Oscar began. It only fueled his irritation and made him anxious for her attention to fall on him. Everything he wasn't used to. In the past, he'd would've given up on this rocky road with Aisha. But instead he was now trying to be patient, asking her a question he's been so curious about especially given her need to push him away. She speaks and the words that come from her mouth bring a little at first,  slowly becoming larger, smile on Freddie's lips. He can tell it's hard for her, to have this type of conversation - it's given away by the light tinge of pink to her cheeks. "I owe you a real date," he murmurs, before tacking on a last thought. "Actually a few of them." He feels it's safe to move closer to Aisha, still being cautious on who was on the other side of the glass and if she needed space. "Think you can sneak away from your chef for a few hours? My mother will gladly watch Aria."

[aisha van buren]

Freddie had an intuitive understanding of her. He had always had it, even when they were teenagers; he knew when she was being a bitch to flirt, and when she was being a bitch because she truly wanted to be left alone, though to everyone else she was just read as a bitch period. Even now, he moves closer to her at exactly the right moment-- any earlier and she would have moved away, any later and she would have perceived it as being too late, conciliatory. Instinctively she moves closer to him in response, wanting nothing more than to fold herself into his embrace, to feel those perfect arms wrap around her. But she doesn't take it that far. "Oscar is actually a qualified nanny..." she starts, for once not intending to goad. But she catches herself, nodding. "Let's drop her off with your mom and go somewhere... I don't know, private. I'm so sick of the gossip in this town."

[freddie beaumont]

Freddie already feels a wave of relief, floating through his veins and relaxing parts of his body that have been so tense for months. Especially heightened when he thought of Aisha with someone else or saw her flirt with the so-called help. They have to take their time warming back up to each other, even if he wants to pull her in and kiss those full lips he's been so desperate for. He loves that she takes a few steps closer to him, as if she's slowly peeling another part of herself to be fully comfortable with him again. It brings another small smile to his face, thinking of the words she murmured a few minutes ago about her not wanting him to give up. He nods his head, agreeing with the plan of dropping Aria off with his mother. Though he loved Montauk, everyone knew each other's business. Any place that they'd go, all eyes would be on them. "How about we go back to the city? It's probably a ghost town like it always is come the weekends." Well, for their crowd of people anyways. "I don't care where we go. I just want to be alone with you."

[aisha van buren]

The air between them has changed, losing some of its charge. There's an unclenching within Aisha, that eternal part of her that seemed to always want to search out a fight finally relaxing. There was little doubt that she would likely benefit tremendously from therapy. If she had been before, maybe she wouldn't have made their relationship a battleground, wouldn't have hid Aria's parentage from him, wouldn't have dangled Oscar in front of him to try and get a rise out of the man. But it was all too late for that now, and she's grateful that he's stuck around through it all. She contemplates his suggestion, the draw of avoiding not just strangers but also the prying eyes of her family holding some appeal. She nods. "Let's go to yours. It's been a long time since I've seen it." In fact, the last time she'd been there she had ended up pregnant again. She presses a hand against her stomach for a moment, glancing up at him. "Do you want to feel?"

[freddie beaumont]

Though Aisha had asked for Freddie not to give up, he also felt like he owed her a lot of gratitude and thanks for equally not giving up on him. She had every right to be mad, upset and hurt by his actions. And here she was, slowly opening herself to him again. It was just a start, he recognized that. He didn't feel swayed by his family to want to make things better between Aisha. Before their intrusions and want to play matchmaker between the pair,  especially now that they were going to have two children, he'd always felt something stir in his stomach whenever she was around. Even if they were arguing and most definitely when they were fucking. She'd made her way into a part of Freddie that he hadn't even really touched upon, usually refusing to show that side of himself. "We can hide out from everyone, order something in if you'd like." He wondered if she had any cravings, knowing that Oscar would have been obliging to her every demand. Her next words surprise him, her hand on her stomach and suddenly he's curious and..a bit nervous. "Okay, yeah, do I just put my hand?" Freddie reaches out his hand for her belly, when she wraps her hand in his - putting it on the spot where the baby must have been just moving. "Does this hurt you or anything?" He asks, when he feels a kick on his own hand that's pressed against her stomach.

[aisha van buren]

Aisha's eyes drift to her daughter, the toddler busying herself with a plate of chopped carrots. She was growing into herself, her personality shining ever stronger every day, her clear blue eyes more reminiscent of her father's than her mother's. It was a good thing she'd told Freddie, since she suspected it would be obvious to anyone looking in no time at all. "Hiding sounds good." Since becoming pregnant with Aria Aisha had become reclusive anyway, heartbroken, then mortified by her changing body, then finally avoidant of prying questions of her parentage. It had been Freddie who had pulled her out of her exile, so it felt fitting that they should exile themselves, if only for a day or two. She can't help but laugh at his hesitancy, forgetting that this was the first pregnancy he got to experience, "Here," she says, taking his hand and placing it on her tiny bump, her skin smooth and stretched already. "No, idiot, it doesn't hurt. It's not comfortable, but I'll forgive her when she's here."

[freddie beaumont]

"My mother is going to be thrilled to have Aria all to herself." Freddie laughs thinking also about how much his mother would enjoy that he was running off with Aisha. She'd made it very clear since their little intervention how much she cared for Aisha. "And I'll feel the same, having you all to the myself." He doesn't mean it in a sexual manner, though of course he wouldn't mind. It'd been months, but he truthfully just wanted to spend some alone time with the woman he couldn't stop thinking about. As Aisha is grabbing his hand, putting it on her belly the correct way, he sees Aria through the glass once more. She's got a plate in front of her, and giggling as she picks at whatever is on the plate. He's careful not to stare too much, wanting to savor this intimate moment out on the balcony with her mother. Her belly was tiny, but the movements he felt were not. He feels it on the palm on his hand and can't help but let his mouth drop open. "Wait, did you just say she? Another girl?"

[aisha van buren]

A flash of guilt runs through Aisha at his comment about his mother. "Not as thrilled as Aria will be." She feels bad for depriving her daughter of this family earlier on in her life, so taken was she with her grandma and grandfather. It had been something that she'd ended up apologizing for profusely to Beatrice, who told her not to worry about it. The woman's understanding of her had been a welcome surprise, an early bonding moment for the two. It felt strange not to bite Freddie's head off, but in a good way, one she could get used to. Maybe. She realizes her mistake, her hand reaching to her mouth as if she could force the words back from whence they came. "Shit, I'm sorry!" She can't help but laugh, trying to read in his expression how much of a blow this news is. "Sorry Freddie, didn't mean to tell you like that... but yes. You're truly outnumbered."

[freddie beaumont]

She laughs at his reaction, a bit of her face covered in surprise. As if she didn't want to say anything yet. The grin that was plastered on Freddie's face grows. A girl. He couldn't believe that they were having another child, not even as his hand was placed against her belly. But here was, excited to hear what they were having. "Of course I'm outnumbered. I feel like this must be some sort of pay back," his head shakes in disbelief but he never lets the smile fall from his face. His hand is back at his side, not wanting to leave it on her belly for longer than normal. Even if he was so fascinated but such an experience. He'd have to text Tate to tell him of his stupidity in asking her if it hurt when the baby moved. "You ready to go now?" His head points in the direction of the balcony door that lead them back to reality. He was much looking forward to some alone time, but didn't want to push his luck if she wished to hang around their daughter a little longer together.