. poetic license

[sylvia constantinou]

S Y L What plans? I'm not gonna invite people along. Oh come on, sex is part of the human experience, it's weird to dance around it. Omggg let me compile a list.

[jack kearney]

Jack No but if people know we're going to be in a certain place around a certain time, some might get it in their head to try to meet you! And I know, I'm an American prude. You got me with that one when you put out the drill, tongs, ball and bag of bread. I was so concerned.

[sylvia constantinou]

S Y L I'm not advertising our location! The only thing I've ever said about you is that I love having sex with you, but I can stop saying that if it makes you uncomfortable. My favourite one is the prank where I did the 'saying my bf's favourite words' thing, you were so cute it felt exploitative to upload so I just kept it for myself.

[jack kearney]

Jack Babe I'm not saying you did, it's just something to be mindful of. There is some fun in privacy. I also love having sex with you and you're the best one to talk about that to. I can't believe you remembered some of those Montana-isms, it was cute of you.

[sylvia constantinou]

S Y L Oh come on, you're telling me you've never talked about it with anyone? Actually don't answer that, of course you haven't. The look on your face, too cute. Gonna watch it again right now.

[jack kearney]

Jack You mean brag, are you asking if I brag about it? I like practicing British and surprising you.

[sylvia constantinou]

S Y L No, I think it's a normal conversation to have between friends. Here's how it might play out: PERSON: How are things with you and Jack? ME: Great thanks, yeah. He's so sweet. PERSON: He really seems it. ME: He's even more so when it's just us, too. PERSON: Aww. And how's the sex? ME: Amazing, I used to worry that it wouldn't be as good with a sweet guy but I was so wrong, it's the opposite. ... a conversation I've had many times. Is that bragging? You're getting good at it.

[jack kearney]

Jack That quickly and casually, interesting. Is there a correlation between sweetness and sexual prowess? My coworkers are probably so annoyed with my new vocabulary.

[sylvia constantinou]

S Y L I've abridged it but pretty much that. I think there is, I think it makes you attentive. Haha if they seem it just ask, "you okay hun?" in your best Essex accent.

[jack kearney]

Jack I see. When did you first start wondering how I was in bed?

[sylvia constantinou]

S Y L Okay this is sooo embarrassing, but when I was a teenager I'd think about you before I went to sleep. I'd picture us on a ranch with two kids, and my mind would always wander to you taking me out in the barn. So in answer to your question: ages ago.

[jack kearney]

Jack In the barn? Wow, Syl. That's better than the toolshed in my thoughts. Or the basement after it was fixed up.

[sylvia constantinou]

S Y L Well we had to hide from the kids. Toolshed sounds risky, what if we knocked something off a high shelf?

[jack kearney]

Jack Gravity and physics don't really exist in teenage boy fantasies. There was just never any privacy in that house, someone was always home. What did we have, a boy and a girl?

[sylvia constantinou]

S Y L I never think of boys fantasising, weirdly. Of course, both with J names. I wasn't very inventive.