patrick x stassi

[pat bohannon]

PAT I won’t complain about black lace. I really can never shave, you’d drop me on the spot.

[stassi siminski]

STASSI you better not! complain or shave, both banned.

[pat bohannon]

PAT yes ma’am. as my reward for listening you can help me figure out what to order for Edie’s baby shower.

[stassi siminski]

STASSI oh god, i'm shit with babies and everything to do with them. text maya.

[pat bohannon]

PAT she has a registry, all you have to do is point and click 'purchase'. crazy how much shit they actually seem to need. did she tell you i saw her the other night?

[stassi siminski]

STASSI decide on a budget and pick the first thing you see that's within it, nothing else for it. noooo, where?

[pat bohannon]

PAT Maya and I are en route to get you. Enjoy the set then come find us outside.

[stassi siminski]

STASSI omg why?? turn around, you guys aren't invited.

[pat bohannon]

PAT Doesn't matter. You come out and meet us or I'll send her in to get you. If you don't want to talk to me for whatever reason, fine. You can go back with Maya.

[stassi siminski]

STASSI you're not my dad.  what do you care anyway.

[pat bohannon]

PAT You've been ignoring me like I am. What do you mean what do I care? Of course I care, don't be stupid.

[stassi siminski]

STASSI i'm busy. funny way of showing it.

[pat bohannon]

PAT Stas what the fuck is going on? Why are you mad at me?

[stassi siminski]

STASSI you seriously have no idea? take one guess and i'll leave willingly.

[pat bohannon]

PAT I know what it is. I can't figure out why you're mad about it.