ruiz, hafsa r.

[Deleted]

full name hafsa rowen ruiz date of birth 5.2.93 home town bali, indonesia current city nyc, new york education NYU radiology major occupation freelance makeup artist/trust fund baby ________________________________________ Your youth was surrounded by the outlandish coral reefs and porcelain, white sand. Your sweaty palms swept through the whiteness of the fine sand, it never making the grip of your weakened clutch, begging to be free as it is. The white sand emanates a reflection of yourself - a paradox. But you were too naive to foresee what you have became. Your parents built this kingdom, a golden array of utensils to feed your soul and drapes to hide you away from evil eyes. They adopted this capitol, Bali, surrounded your youth with the pureness of the south, white sands, and atrocious yet hypnotizing ocean. This was the place you only knew of and the depths of the oceans had isolated you from ever exploring anywhere else. They wanted your life laced with the pureness of the Hindu rituals, fresh coconut juices, and rain as cold as the winter nights. There was no other reason besides your parents wanting to expose you to a pure culture. They were adamant to raise you like gold. Gold cathedrals, gold crosses and a gold casket for the death of your soul. You were binded by the painting of your life, to make sure you are...golden. You are your mother's and father's saving grace, the first born in which they will hold you up on a pedestal so high that will soon have you hanging on to the heavens by a noose. Your smiles were sweet, so sticky and breathes feverishly rapid in the humid air, as you ran to your father's arms. They gave you everything. You learned to be selfish and immaculate, you held your own head high with pride as the years went by. (Forgive me mother, for I am rotten and I am mine.) "I was a Dominican and Persian girl living among Indonesian people, most of whom were religious and just traditional. And I had no choice but to be traditional. Well I really didn't have a voice in who I was cause my parents had everything figured out for their precious golden daughter. It was really bittersweet like butterflies and needles. I had everything but at the same time stripped of my own identity that I haven't even figured out yet. I was turning 13 when my dad got a promotion from this hospital, I really had no clue the details of his career as a surgeon, but all I knew was that we had to move to London. Bali did leave a huge mark on me, and the way I was raised drew me into a very mellow and spiritual person. My mom was a fortune teller and really popular among everyone in the city. She was so spot on about everyone's life, there was no wonder why my mom figured out my deepest secret. Anyways, so back to how living in Bali for 13 years really molded me into this artsy and spiritual freak of the sorts. I'm really into human nature, spirits, ancient myths, art and shit like that. I really don't take much seriously." "My parents spoon fed me everything, and made sure I had everything to grow and become perfect. But then they hovered over me like an umbrella protecting me from things as light as rain. I didn't have much of an identity. I had to argue and fight to be free, to actually attend a normal secondary school, instead of being at home all day learning from my parents. I admit I was spoiled and I have a sort of selfish and cockiness vibe. I never really paid any attention into changing that about myself, people can either take it or leave it. I was careless and naive because I had everything done for me and I was always told what to do, I knew nothing else." You were cyber girl and your whole life was on the internet. The only friends you had were those who followed your blog and those who posted comments. ________________________________________ cleo valerie mercado your most recent work was on a hiatus :c