JACOBS, Violet S

[Deleted]

full name violet sophia jacobs (nee redford) date of birth 04.04.88 home town big timber, montana current city nyc, ny education high school occupation former flight attendant . current bartender ________________________________________ likes bonfires, the ocean, caramel, airstream trailers, the smell of woodchips, medium-rare steak, converse, low-maintenance people, spending entire sundays in bed, wildflowers, pancakes, hemingway, travel, long roadtrips, potstickers, the smell of leather, montana mountains, calloused hands, vulnerable people, gold, canvas, thunderstorms, cinnabuns, whiskey, tequila, patrick stewart, rum, ale, creative personalities. dislikes olives, social media, humidity, excuses, top 40, gin, vodka, maraschino cherries, coolers, wine, cellphones, clingers, frozen, the kardashians, reality television, halloween, crop tops, procrastination, emptying the dishwasher, bad dreams, tackiness, high maintenance people, control-freaks, fish, the big bang theory. ________________________________________ Have you ever heard of scent memory? I get it all the time. I'll be sitting, minding my own business, and I'll get a big whiff of leather. It'll knock the wind right out of me, and take me back to when I was twelve, saddling up my painted horse. I'd be tightening the girth around his fat barrel, and he'd be ruffling my too-long hair with his nose, tickling my neck with his horsey breath. I come from a long line of cattle-ranchers and whiskey-distillers. Honestly, if you feel bothered to google Big Timbers, Montana, you'll get a clear view of my childhood. Open fields, big mountains, cowboys, horses, roping, hootenannies, and cattle. My mom's side are ranchers, and for most of my childhood that side of things maintained my interest. She being the only child (bar her brother, who was trampled to death several years before I was even born) had inherited the ranch my family currently resides on. 245 acres of rolling hills, dotted with cows, kept by blood and long-time family friends. I was raised on horseback, glued to the saddle. and obsessed with anything to do with horses. Looking back on it, I was a really rough-and-tough kid, and strangers used to genuinely worry about my well being. I remember getting kneed by a horse (my fault) and going to a school dance with a black eye, my teacher asked me if my parents were hurting me. I was the girl who dressed like a boy, and who didn't start wearing make-up till the tender age of seventeen. Bringing me to my father, who co-owns a distillery with his three brothers. I've always been a daddy's girl, though I think it has less to do with the fact that I'm a girl, and more with that out his four children (I have three brothers) I'm the most like him. I can't remember the first time he brought me to Redford Distillery - where we made whiskey bourbon. It's like a room in our house, much like the barn. Though I can remember my first sip of bourbon, and how much I hated it, but wanted to please him I pretended to like it. And eventually I did like it. Where my mother to me is a 'rancher's wife', simply a mother. My father pressed me to be my own person. My mom clung to me when I wanted to leave, she embraced every man that ever entered my life. My father has bigger aspiration for me. He pushed me to leave, and looked judgementally at ever relationship I entered. He is supportive, but at the same time he never wants me to depend on him. Really, he's just like Jax, I know what they mean when they say 'you'll marry your father'. ________________________________________ ________________________________________ I am not a good lover, so I've been told. I'm distracted, and I'm cruel. My romantic resume makes me out as unemployable, and my references would be bitter as well as cold. I'm prone to letting things sizzle, ignoring the problem till it evaporates. I've broken up over texts, post-it notes, I've even changed my number to avoid a guy. I am the type of person that always has somewhere to be. Jackson makes me want to be nowhere, when I'm with him the distractions seem to fall wayside. There are little urges, my flighty tendencies settle. Six years ago I would have made myself sick, but then it was around  six years ago when I met him. He was an afterthought, on one of my first flights. Drifting through the cabins, I asked him if he had his seatbelt done up. I really didn't think much of him till I went back to my own seat, greeted by my co-worker Diana saying, "did you check out that piece of man-meat?" No, I hadn't. That prompted a double check through the curtain, and a mortifying second of eye contact. I suffered endless teasing from both him and my team. Flirtations that stretched into months on end, as it was seriously only once on a blue moon that we ran into each other. Near the end (or was it the beginning?) we happened to check into the same hotel, and spent half a night crying about our lives whilst sharing good spirits. During our next day flight we fucked in the plane bathroom. I still receive playful backlash for it, Diana drunkenly brought it up during speeches at our wedding.  It was easy to love Jax. It would have been easy even if he wasn't built like a God, if he were gangly with bad teeth and a lisp, I would love him anyway. He's filled with empathy, and his heart is so full, he's easily the best person I know. In comparison to him I'm full of guilt, I feel as though my life has been lead so selfishly. But I'm learning, and that's another thing, I love the way he makes me appreciate. There's balance in our relationship, we give and we take, we know when the quiet needs to take over, or when the silence needs to be filled. Our lives our separate, though they meet in the middle. Outside our marriage we're able to maintain ourselves, as if not to be defined by us. And though our identities are our own, we collapse into each other so passionately and perfectly it's hard to imagine it any other way.  ________________________________________ SMS - KEITH REDFORD - JULY 06/14 Hi, Dad, 911. Tried calling your cell and home, no answer, you must be busy. Give me a call right when you see this, I have bad news. ________________________________________ your name play-by your most recent work link to thread