MAHI'AI, Malia J.

[Deleted]

malia jasmine mahi'ai TWENTY-FOUR , MARINE BIOLOGIST - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - My brother and I were born on the 16th September in Tuscaloosa, Alabama, to Warren Morris and Kalani Mah'ai-Morris. Throughout our childhood and teenage years we were Kai and Malia Morris, and looking back now, I'm surprised our father agreed to those first names, so reluctant was he when it came to engaging with our mother's Hawaiian ancestry. No no, to Warren we were strictly American, and like many Alabamians, my dad's idea of what constituted an American entailed a very white specific set of criteria. Trying to remind him of Hawaii's (unfortunate) ties to America mostly led to him brush us off, or worse, tell a story about how embarrassing he found my grandparents' behavior on the rare occasions he had been dragged to the islands. As a result of this hostility, my mom resorted to microdosing us with Hawaiianness behind his back. We would be told stories from her childhood in a whisper, taught about its history only when my father was out at work. We would draw pictures of lush green volcanic mountains and turquoise seas, and my mom would tell my dad they were based on some cartoon we'd seen, not the photographs we'd pour over behind closed doors. It's a strange thing to feel your own heritage is a secret, something illicit and off limits. Particularly when your otherness elicits all sorts of reactions from your classmates, many of whom have more in common with your dad than you'd prefer. The marriage was never ideal - far from - but it took some time for it to implode. The final challenge came when Kai and I were seventeen, and somehow, despite the million safe sex talks we'd been subjected to, our parents failed to take their own advice and had an oopsie baby. So my sister Alani was born, and the relationship deteriorated almost immediately after that, with my mom ultimately deciding to take Lani back home to O'ahu. Suddenly I found myself living with just my dad and brother, sister to a baby I barely got to see. All of these things were extremely tumultuous, naturally, but none compared to the most significant event of my life to date: meeting Declan Kelly.  Declan Kelly. I don't have words that won't seem cliche. From the very moment I met him outside our college building, where he was stood chatting to my brother... it was like being on the edge of an insane vertical drop on the world's tallest rollercoaster, and the second he looked at me came the rush of the fall. I was no stranger to crushing and crushing hard, but this was the big daddy of crushes, this was unlike anything I had ever felt before. This is without him even speaking to me! Maybe I'm romanticising it in retrospect, but I swear I knew then, in that exact moment that it was him, that this was my person.  He was cool and smooth and sweet. He had sisters and it shone through him, in his openness, his consideration for others. He was so tender but so masculine, I wanted to marry him and I wanted him to pound me. The effect he had on me never went away, I was transformed into a different person by his company... anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself. We had a quick connection and it didn't take long for us to be spending every waking moment together, with me often going to his after classes since he had family obligations and I had family complications. It was crazy how quickly I fell for him. Well, it would be crazy, but if you met him you'd understand why.  We became conspiratorial. We were hungry for something other than what we had, we wanted to be away from everything we knew, to be somewhere we could reinvent ourselves. Somewhere we could be us, knowable only to each other. We tried to think of the furthest away point from Alabama, and in our limited experience of the world we settled on Portland. So that was it, and one day not long after we packed up and drove cross country to Oregon, where we spent a couple weeks in a motel before finding the most rundown little apartment you've ever seen. I loved that apartment. I loved that life. We were studying our passion subjects, steeped in science by day and entangled in each other by night. No matter how hard it was to pay the bills, or how much I worried about what was to come, I never once regretted that spontaneous trip across the country. When I was with Dec, anything seemed possible. It all came crashing down when my mom called to say my Grandma was sick. With Lani so young she was struggling, and I knew immediately that I had to help. Something died inside me at that moment and I've yet to revive it. I was like a zombie telling Declan I had to leave... it's all a blur to me now, I just remember that phone call, a kiss made salty from tears, and suddenly I was on a plane. People don't really feel sorry for you when you're in paradise, and I can understand that. It really is the most beautiful place on earth and I decided very soon after I landed that conservation was the only thing that could keep me going. Nature is so vast and so ancient, it helps you to understand that your time on earth is fleeting. I finally was able to embrace my culture, to shed my father's name and be reborn as a more whole version of myself. My heart was heavy with love but also with envy for my little sister, a true child of O'ahu who didn't know what it was like to grow up in Alabama. On my saddest days, her freckled face was the only thing that could cheer me up.  I struggled to cut the cord. I wrote letters to Dec, I called and texted him, I wrote long emails as a prelude to the letters. It took me a long time to show anyone except my grandma much attention, but it was she who finally shook me from my self pity. "`A`ohe loa i ka hana a ke aloha." Distance is ignored by love. I suddenly realized how selfish I was being-- I was the one who left, but here I was, preventing him from living his life to the full. I sent him a final letter and tried my best to put him out of my mind for good. I failed at that, by the way. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - "If I had to sum my sister up, I'd say that she thinks too much. As kids my parents eventually had to ban her from watching the news, as she couldn't help catastrophizing everything she saw. If we passed by a road accident in the car, she'd get teary about the kids who might have to live without parents, even though there was no evidence that there were casualties, or even kids, in the first place. She can't help herself. Moving to O'ahu did wonders for her. The pace of the island is so slow, she couldn't help but have to still her thoughts. Though we initially moved due to unfortunate circumstances with our nana, it was easy to find a silver lining, since we suddenly found ourselves in the most beautiful place on earth. I'm not ashamed to say that it was a spiritual experience. Despite not being born there, and despite our asshole dad being about as spiritually destitute as it's possible to be, being in O'ahu felt like coming home. Nothing would make me move back to the mainland now, and I think it would be the same for Lia, if not for one exception.  She won't admit to me why she's moving to California, but she doesn't need to, it's obvious. It was obviously something she was going to end up doing from the minute she left, since she never stopped messaging, calling and writing him. I like Dec a lot and I know he's a good man, but I think she's making a mistake. All things have a natural end and I'm afraid I think we're past that point, but I'll be there to pick up the pieces if that is the case."  - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -            if malia was a sim ASPIRATION: SOULMATE     this sim wants to find and live a rewarding life with 'the one'! TRAIT: CHILD OF THE OCEAN   answer the call of the ocean! sims with this trait will prefer water related activities and feel closer to denizens of the sea. TRAIT: LOYAL    loyal sims value their relationships and fully commit to them, whether they are friendship, romance, or even work! they avoid lying and cheating because their loved ones' trust is very important to them. TRAIT: CREATIVE    these sims tend to be inspired, can share creative ideas with other sims, and may become upset if they're not creative for a period of time.

lex      aisha potter     resident