SIMINSKI, Anastasia I.

[stassi siminski]

25 . DOOR GIRL @ THE BOX CHRONIC TIKTOK OVERSHARER 🕸  🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 CLOSED CAPTION "I'm not even gonna apologize for long it's been, 'cause you know what? I have been going through it getting you this content. I swear to God, the men in this city were put here solely to test me. Anyway, I missed you all. This week started with dinner at Dante's with the cowboy, who was in town from Texas. He's been kinda hot and cold with me, which I put down to his not being in the city so I'm out of sight, out of mind, but some of the things he was saying... I'll say it, I'm like 99% sure he has a girlfriend back there. Maybe a wife. Girl, if you recognize this watch, DM me, we'll compare notes. Assuming he doesn't have a girl at home, it was an okay date. He's got the southern charm and this ability to make you feel like a lady, even if you're a hungover rat like I was. After dinner we jumped in a cab with a plan to get drinks at the Beekman but en route we passed by my place and I don't know, I decided I just wanted to get out there and call it a night. He was openly pissed about it so I decided to go in and see Bodega Boy just in case he decided to give me any hassle, but nothing happened. Watching this clip back you can tell how busy BB was and how much he was pretending not to be annoyed by my hovering, hahaha. Isn't he so cute? He loves it, don't let him fool you. He's still single ladies - slip into his DMs but don't ever admit I sent you. Cowboy texted me the next day and brushed off the awkwardness from the night before, but I still felt icky about it all. He is wildly handsome though and he knows how to organize a date, so I'll probably see him again next time he's in town. Unless the potential wife shows up, I'm so serious, my DMs are open. Anyway, I'm getting ready for work - promise I'll post again this weekend, I've got three dates lined up this week. Kisses." THE DJ GOVERNMENT NAME:  jasper cowan LAST TAROT READING: the lovers - in reverse: disharmony, trust issues, imbalance, conflict SUMMARY: the primary situationship in stassi's life. it's tricky to post much of jasper without his tattoos giving him away, especially since he's a familiar face on the club scene. frequently crossing paths as two prominent partiers in new york's nightlife inner circle, it was inevitable that they would meet, fuck, and ultimately fight. there's a familiar push-pull dynamic to their relationship with each of them as destructive and hot and cold as the other, making him perfect fodder for her dating series as audiences are split on whether they're doomed to be together or doomed to be apart. when it comes to jasper, stassi's main motivation is always to "do it for the plot". BODEGA BOY GOVERNMENT NAME: patrick bohannon LAST TAROT READING: judgement - rebirth, inner calling, absolution SUMMARY: an oasis in the sea of anonymous men, bodega boy is the only man to have waived his anonymity. such rights are afforded only because he is not actually someone she's dating, and so as frequently as he's featured, stassi is never really revealing much about him or their real dynamic once the phone is put away. bodega boy is often the voice of reason in stassi's videos, and all of his cameos are partnered with her call to action for all her followers to light up his DMs. a consistent thread in her dating series, naturally many of her fans are determined bodega boy x brooklyn baby shippers, though they have yet to have their dreams acknowledged by either party. NEPO BABY GOVERNMENT NAME: frederick beaumont LAST TAROT READING: the sun - optimism, vitality, joy, confidence SUMMARY: though all her dates are anonymous, freddie is easily recognized by those who know him irl. splashy dates in the best restaurants, picked up by private cars, nepo baby (also known as NP) is a popular character in her dating stories, usually providing light relief compared to some of her more toxic companions. still, stassi will always point out his numerous red flags for her audience, and she conveniently forgets to mention that he is the most frequent recipient of her 4am "you up?" texts.  THE EX GOVERNMENT NAME: preston fletcher LAST TAROT READING: death, in reverse - resistance to change, inner purging SUMMARY: preston was the last person stassi loved, or at least that's what she'd tell you. after two shaky years of dating on and off, he called it off in the spring of 2023, leaving anastasia heartbroken. he cited her immaturity and her general strangeness as the reasons - working on wall st, he couldn't see how she'd fit into his life long term. against her better judgment (and when she needs a tiktok engagement boost) she sometimes agrees to dinner with him, which usually ends in a huge fight (and lots of tiktok views when she spills it all in the aftermath). 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 THINGS YOU'LL FIND IN STASSI'S APARTMENT - more candles than could ever be considered safe, mostly wedged into empty wine bottles • herbs drying out • the lingering smell of sage and incense • botanical prints in haphazard gallery walls • draped lace • fruit punch gatorade • velvet furniture • dark wood • scattered tarot cards • marlboro lights • essential oils • piles of thrifted clothes on antique armchairs • rusty mirrors • dried flowers • black ribbon • teacups with tea leaves lingering in their base • piles of books she'll get around to reading eventually • half full bottles of lexapro. 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 Kelly C 7 CONTRIBUTIONS Bad attitude Wow I have never been treated so badly. I had heard the Box was the place to go and me and my friends (young good looking people FYI) were turned away by the anorexic bitch on the door. No reason given!! Heard her tell another group it would be $2k for a table LOL this place is delusional Roberto L 18 CONTRIBUTIONS SO RUDE Gross venue terrible staff so rude to everyone for no reason Amanda K 21 CONTRIBUTIONS Almost ruined our visit We had been out at all kinds of places in the city when someone suggested we go to the Box. When we got there, there was a big line, so promising. It moved quickly, but only because they were turning people away! The girl on the door was chewing gum and openly looked us up and down when we arrived, it was so rude. We almost left straight away. Then she told us it would be $2k per person minimum! She was obviously being intentional because she let other people in no questions asked, no fee charged. Obviously on a power trip. Avoid at all costs. Troy F 1 CONTRIBUTION You're the problem Crying laughing reading these reviews. The girl on the door has a name and it's Stassi, and she is soooo right to turn you locals away. The whole reason you've heard about the Box and want to go is because of people like Stassi. There is a vibe and she is its architect!! Tourists be damned. The Box is one of the best nights out in NYC and it's not for everyone, that's what makes it so great. You can all crawl back to Florida or Utah or wherever the fuck now, buh bye x 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 🖤 🕸 "Stassi is one of my two younger sisters, the middle of us three. She is such a middle child. She's obsessed with things being fair and will be the first to lash out if she thinks they aren't, though she's suspiciously quiet when they aren't fair in her favour. Like, she lives in our aunt's rent controlled apartment for so little money, do you hear me or Eve complaining? Stas is always the first to lash out, period. She's a fighter, sometimes even fighting opps that aren't even real. She's quick to take offense, she loves to argue, she can be a nightmare. She also holds a grudge like no one else I know. Three years ago we found out our dad was having an affair, which yeah, that sucked. But they worked through it and they're still together, which is no one's business but theirs. Try telling that to Stas, she literally hasn't said a word to him since. Not at Christmas, on his birthday, nothing. It's pretty impressive. If I'm making her sound like a nightmare that's because she is. But she's also one of the most interesting people I know, she has a totally unique way of looking at the world and her place in it. She doesn't let what other people might think of her factor in to any of her decision making, she never hesitates to call something out if she thinks it's wrong, she's happy to take someone on even if they're ten times her size - literally or figuratively. She feels things very deeply and that's a blessing and a curse in equal measure."

lex     bella    resident