. middle of adventure

[mirren hewitt]

misschief managed  ONLINE she'll be in your debt forever, and will always be keen to remind you of that! i dunno tbh. i'm so glad you're on because it's just...impossible to talk to someone here that isn't involved. they either know them or its my mom or like, matt it even felt weird to try to explain. i don't even think i've tried to mourn anything it's all just been so intense. and now i feel like it's hard not to think they'll always be on each other's sides too no matter what.

[river hawkins]

lycanthrope  ONLINE Aw, I don't think I've ever seen you so down Em. Why don't you talk me through it, might help to get it all out?

[mirren hewitt]

misschief managed  ONLINE ok, but buckle up and sorry for the ramble so you know about R and C and our little childhood pact and everything. I guess I took it more seriously than I realized because finding out they were hooking up was such a big blow to me. not only bc they’d been hiding it from me but because we’d all kind of been fighting off and on all summer. everything was just so different and I really hate change, I don’t do well with it. anyway, I feel like from then on I had to be on the defensive because they were suddenly some cohesive unit. getting to align their stories and both just back each other up…it was so isolating. R had also kind of been seeing this guy who I knew bc he dated Matt’s sister? confusing but we’ve been friendly…also he was our TA this past semester. plot thickens. she brought him to our summer house and then immediately told him to leave which was so weird, and when I found out why I told him bc I was still in shock and upset and thought he should know why too. backfired because he went after R about it, who knew I told him, and then again it was this 2v1 fight. idk when I’ll never feel outnumbered again and I just miss being at least an equal share. or like any share at all.

[river hawkins]

lycanthrope  ONLINE It was out of line for them to sneak around on you like that, surely they see that? I'm sure if it had been you she'd have lost it, she sounds like a firecracker to put it mildly. Man, trios suck, someone always has to be on the outs, I'm really sorry it's you right now. All sounds really messy. Sincere question, are you sure you still want to be friends with them?

[mirren hewitt]

misschief managed  ONLINE i think she’s just been competitive or compared to someone else her whole life and doesn’t know how not to think that way. they felt bad but C just kept brushing it off as not a big deal, and right now it feels like I have to move mountains to get back in his good graces. which I don’t get either. well I kind of do, I said some mean things but we all have. we never have fought this badly so I don’t think we know how to handle it. but I do - they’re such an important extension of me. it just sucks.

[river hawkins]

lycanthrope  ONLINE Two questions. 1. Do you think he might like you? And 2. do you think they'll actually date?

[mirren hewitt]

misschief managed  ONLINE no, I think he likes her. which I guess answers question number two.

[river hawkins]

lycanthrope  ONLINE Ah, tricky. I hate to say it but you probably need to ride out the honeymoon period. They'll start getting pissy with each other soon enough, everyone does.

[mirren hewitt]

misschief managed  ONLINE but it’s not fair to put me in the middle of that then, you know? i feel like it’s big of me to even want to be supportive - but if it falls apart I don’t want to have to pick a side. they just…don’t think like that.

[river hawkins]

lycanthrope  ONLINE Because they wanna keep fucking. Nothing's gonna make them see sense, Em. You're gonna drive yourself crazy trying to make them.

[mirren hewitt]

misschief managed  ONLINE easier said than done. idk, to me I would never put sex over friendship…but it might be a minority way to think.

[river hawkins]

lycanthrope  ONLINE Definitely a minority. I'm really sorry, it sounds like you're a better friend to them than they are to you. Maybe one day they'll see it.

[mirren hewitt]

misschief managed  ONLINE it’s weird to me that it is. a temporary high vs something foundational but what do I know. god, maybe my relationship with Matt was more dismal than I thought.

[river hawkins]

lycanthrope  ONLINE You think? You didn't want to rip his clothes off all the time?

[mirren hewitt]

misschief managed  ONLINE …no?