SCHAEFER, Roisin M.

[Deleted]

if they only knew
that souls cannot be fooled

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FULL NAME: roisin mackenzie schaefer
NICKNAMES: ro
AGE: 22
BIRTHDAY: 11-14-1991
CURRENT CITY: New York City
HOMETOWN: dublin, ireland/spokane, washington
EDUCATION: stanford university
OCCUPATION: hydraulic fracturing lobbyist

FACEBOOK NAME: rosinschaefer
TWITTER HANDLE: @roschaef
INSTAGRAM: @roschaef
TUMBLR URL: thankyouforfracking.tumblr.com

COUNTOWN:

5 things I don't feel guilty about

• my occupation
• smoking
• anything
• ever
• #yolo

4 things I feel guilty about

• nada
• seriously
• no
• regratssss

3 people on my recently called list

• jen
• boss
• isaac

2 realities I fear most

• old age
• being laid off

1 solace

• gifs of people walking away from explosions

LOVE SEASONAL:

your most cringe worthy sexual experience Just a weird foot fetish guy. Not into that.

the most desperate thing you've done for love
Well, I was engaged when I was eighteen. Right out of highschool, it was so dramatic. We were too young. I was too smart. He was too careless. I said "i do". He ran. Nicky Sparks will write about it one day.

one love or many loves?
Many loves. I love lamp. I love... Carpet.


an occasion where you've given/received flowers
My ex used to bring me flowers a lot. Orchids are my favorite but i'll take just about anything. The problem with flowers is that they can so easily meet death with the touch of my fingers. I'm forgetful, don't really do my research with living things. Feel free to skip the flowers, chocolates are the new cool.



FAMILY: William Schaefer, theology professor
PARENTS: Melissa Scaefer, attorney
SIBLINGS: Maeve Scaefer
OTHERS: NA



The best way to describe the Schaefers is very by the books. They're very strict in a moral sense and never let us forget it. My father is a very spiritual person and considers my profession dishonorable. I used to really respect what he does but as I look back he was a bit too pushy. Poor Nieve is suffering and I know it. I took the 18 years like a champ, she'll get through it.



LONG ANSWER:


Where do you draw your inspiration from? Who gives you muse?

Killing babies, poisoning water, and obliterating natural resources. Welcome to the frack life. No one would ever believe me if I said my inspiration comes from nature, but it's true. There have been many opportunities for me to travel over the years because of my job and I'm very grateful for that. Seeing the everything from Geneva to Ann Arbor to Bermuda, it's a dream. When I tell the more informed about my occupation as a lobbyist for a Marcellus shaling equitable gas company, they immediate spit out their Evian like its tap.

Then the others think I mean "fucking" instead of fracking or was in that movie with Jim from the office. No one really gets it. Even my colleagues are just in it for the money these days. That's not the point of this job. Adjusting to our environment, that's the future. Learning from some of the worlds greatest, explosion loving scientists is one of the coolest projects I've ever been a part of. Creating new resources is going to change this planet. If you don't like it then you can eat a dick.

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ROISIN MACKENZIE SCHAEFER 22 / Female / Heterosexual / Single New York, USA

Last Online: 1 week ago Ethnicity: Irish Height: 5'10 Body Type: Fit Smokes: Yes Drinks: Yes

Religion: -- Job: Equitable Gas Lobbyist Offspring: None Pets: None Speaks: English, Dutch

my self summary:

Professional merchant of death. You can also find me on linkdn.

What I'm Doing with My Life:

Fracking. Kaboom.

I'm Really Good At:

Napping on planes. Napping in general... Let me get back to this in ten. I could use a snoozer.

Favorite Books, Movies, Shows, Music & Food:

Books: Tyranny of words, up in the air, bossypants
Movies: fargo, up in the air, walk hard, clueless
Shows: daily show, colbert report, pete holmes, cspan, veep, homeland
Music: apache relay, generationals, jeff buckley
Food: kettle chips

The Six Things I Could Never Do Without:

iphone, wallet, keys, lipstick, passport, gps

I Spend a lot of Time Thinking About:

People behind the screen. Critics mostly, they ain't even kno it.

On a Typical Friday Night I Am:

Getting schwasteypants.

The Most Private Thing I'm willing to Admit:

I have a scar shaped like a smile near my wrist from one if the days I spent working in Harrisburg with the actual laborers.

I'm Looking For:

The one. Have you seen her? Something words words. I ain't saying she a gold digger.

you should message me if:

What even? Just text me.

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ALIAS: mallory
AGE: 3005
PLAY-BY: cintia
MEMBER GROUP: nyc
INSPIRATION: the bachelor