. shotgun

[tara scott]

TARA She’d never, you know that. Well that’s a stupid question. How does it look like it’s working? I was expecting worse, but that’s still rich. How did it feel before you realized it was invasive? Sad? Proud? Fraudulent? Natural?

[Deleted]

RILEY I guess I mean how do you feel, right this very second. All of the above? At the time I was surprised, when she was saying nice things about him I really did feel proud. Then as soon as we said goodbye to each other and she told me to give him a hug from her I felt really sad. I've kinda felt sad since.

[tara scott]

TARA If I just think about me, it feels good to talk to you. It’s been a long time. I bet. He’s in such a little independent stage right now. I used to tell him to give me a hug and he’d throw his little arms up and let me pick him up and smother him with kisses. Now I say “Theo give mama a hug” and his new thing is coming up from behind and wrapping his arms and legs around my leg and holding on for dear life, it’s so cute. Cleaning the house with him refusing to let go is my new quarantine workout.

[Deleted]

RILEY It feels good for me too. Cute. No wonder you’re so happy.

[tara scott]

TARA I have to admit, I'm kind of taken back hearing you sound like you care even a little bit.. about my son.

[Deleted]

RILEY Yeah. Must be weird, since he’s got nothing to do with me, right?

[tara scott]

TARA It wasn't necessary for me to throw that in there. Ignore it, I'm done with that for now. Do you want to talk about him?

[Deleted]

RILEY It was, but I don’t blame you for it. I dunno, honestly. Part of me is desperate for details and part of me desperately doesn’t want to hear it.

[tara scott]

TARA It's too messy and sad, I think it's for the best that we don't.

[Deleted]

RILEY But I want to know. I keep getting these dreams, Tara.

[tara scott]

TARA And what happens when you know? Do you think you're going to feel any better then? Tell me about them.

[Deleted]

RILEY I don’t know, it’s not like this has happened to me before! It’s stupid.

[tara scott]

TARA You're going to feel worse. So what? I want to hear about them.

[Deleted]

RILEY Try me. I don’t know, it’s nothing special. It’s just I wake up in this super nice house in the Garden District, not like a mansion, it’s homelier than that. Feels lived in, like I’ve been there for years. I’m on my own but I’ve got a wedding band on, and the bed’s still warm on my wife’s side, I can smell her perfume on the pillow... this is dumb. Forget I said anything.

[tara scott]

TARA You have a son that you don’t know, and that has no idea who you are. That’s not bad enough? Where the hell do you want me to begin? No, keep going.