. rambling man

[Deleted]

EZRA I'm sorry, it's my fault. I keep things vague then get frustrated when anyone returns the favor. Oh I'm fine. It's just that you have a very calming way about you, that's all. The Saoirse Ronan to my Timothee Chalamet.

[madelyn holt]

MADS Don't be sorry - we're all just wired the way we are. But know you can call any time. I'll soothe you with the boring story of how I've been furloughed for 6 months. Let's request LadyBird and Little Women to be featured on boat movie nights.

[Deleted]

EZRA See, calming! Oh Mads, I'm sorry, that's so shit. Genius. Are you gonna make any diva demands?

[madelyn holt]

MADS Rational* I'd say it's fine, but it's boring. And now I feel like a brat at this point spending my dad's money on spa appointments and dissatisfying wine. Frette sheets, chocolate on my pillow every evening, a spontaneous spicy margarita night in the middle of the ocean when they don't have any limes onboard?

[Deleted]

EZRA What are dads for if not bankrolling spa appointments and disappointing wine? You're a genius, and now I'm craving a spicy margarita.

[madelyn holt]

MADS A good guilt trip or two, but aside from that just general absence. So yummy, I line the rim with just straight jalapeño juice sometimes, the burn’s kind of appealing. What about you, what are your requests gonna be?

[Deleted]

EZRA Trust and believe, it could be worse. Stop it Mads, you're turning me on. God, maybe that no one talk directly to me? They'll love the diva aspect, I'll enjoy the quiet.

[madelyn holt]

MADS Well, I know I can definitely take your word for it. Were you and Lux still hooking up before she got kicked off your list? You'll have to shove a camera away as you slam the bathroom door at least once. I'll give the faux apology.

[Deleted]

EZRA Yeah, we're still hooking up now even. Hahaha oh god I'm cringing at the thought of it already, but I'll do it. Who even watches this show?

[madelyn holt]

MADS Don't tell mom. Who knows - I think they floated demographic numbers in the pitch e-mail but my eyes glazed over. Just saw some numbers and dates and Mediterranean and the words Ezra Cohen in big bold font.

[Deleted]

EZRA My mom feels more like a freelance colleague than a mom to be honest. How's yours? All that matters! Let's make a vacation of it once filming wraps? As much as we can in these times.

[madelyn holt]

MADS More like a mother-in-law. Calls at the wrong times and asks too many weird questions - but always the cat that got the canary each time she gets a show renewal. Still surprise you even agreed, I feel like I was always the sell out! Now I'm the unemployed sell out, so bring on the extension. All the time in the world.

[Deleted]

EZRA Hahaha, my mom thinks that's the most important thing in the universe too. Cackles herself to sleep whenever someone gets demoted to friend of the housewives. I think that's gonna happen to her pretty soon though. I know, I think Covid is getting to me, I'll do anything not to be in my house on my own. Dream, I'll start planning.

[madelyn holt]

MADS Does that make them more or less inclined to stir up the drama? I barely pay attention after our exit - maybe your mom will toss our wedding at them. Save the day. They knew how to get us when we were down. Have you been by yourself this whole time?

[Deleted]

EZRA Usually they have to go hard to try and get Housewife status back. I know because my mom talks about it constantly. What a special that'd be! Yeah for the most part. Was with Lux for a while, before the restraining order. How about you?