. give up the ghost

[Deleted]

Radiohead's The King of Limbs plays across his Sonos system, filling every white walled, high ceilinged room of his loft apartment. Huge black iron framed windows look out on the unusually quiet city, whilst just as big framed black and white photos of beautiful women looking forlorn lean against walls, not yet hung. It was a stark place to live, everything black, white or shades of grey, pieces of heavy, expensive furniture dotted around. It was somewhere between the fantasies of a pretentious art kid and a modern Patrick Bateman, just how he liked it, though he knew Athena would not. He's dressed to match the place, in a black t-shirt and a pair of black cashmere sweatpants. As he opens the door, he holds out a glass of red wine. "Mind the furnishings," he says, at a loss for something more meaningful to say.

[athena mccarthy]

It's been so long since Athena has left her home that anything more than sweats feels like dressing up. Flared jeans make her legs look a million miles long and the blue sweater that sits above her naval suddenly looks last season compared to all the grey fleece she's been wearing. When she ruffles her long hair into place, the air fills with the soft scent of peach shampoo. Much like her wardrobe it's also been neglected, but at least it's washed. She raps at the door and when it swings open she's greeted by a tall glass of red. "Alright," she pulls the mask from her face and stuffs it in the pocket of her coat. His apartment feels colder than the New York streets and she takes a few steps in to take a sip of wine before she hesitates to remove her winter coat. "Why did you move?"

[Deleted]

Athena enters his apartment, bringing with her a splash of colour that the place sorely needed. Seeing her is bittersweet, instantly bringing a rush of affection for all the time they had spent together, soured only by the time spent apart. "I'll take your coat," he says, holding a hand out. He shrugs at the question. "I bought this place to rent it out, then decided it was nicer than my place so decided to rent that out instead. Insane that you can still find tenants in this economy but I suppose the location is what it is. There's a nice couple living there now." It's very unlike him to talk so much, particularly about something so mercenary, but he feels awkward and wants to fill the air.

[athena mccarthy]

Her two toned eyes glance around the apartment. It was strange to be in a place that was so opposite of hers. Late last year she'd painted her apartment because she felt it wasn't colourful enough. Julian's looked like a greyscale film that she wanted to dump a rainbow into. "Hm," she takes a sip of wine and looks at the photographs leaned against the wall. Her shoulders roll the camel coloured coat off and she hands it to him, "thank you." She moves a few steps and ruffles a folded blanket into perfection, "I've lived at mine for a few years, maybe I should find something nicer."

[Deleted]

He watches her as she takes the place in, practically able to hear her thoughts. It was so far from her tastes and probably not the most welcoming environment, not least because he was being weird as fuck. "I can put the fire on if you're cold," he says, hanging her coat up by the door. He returns to the glass of red wine he'd left on the coffee table, taking a long gulp. "But your place is so... you," he says, thinking back to his last visit and feeling a pang of regret that he hadn't insisted on going there instead.

[athena mccarthy]

She nods and forces her pout into something of a smile, "could you? I'd like that." She expects to sink into the couch she chooses to sit on, but it's a bit showy and stiff like most furniture you spend loads of money on. "I'm just kidding. I'd hate to learn a new layout... I just painted too. This colour called Gothic Green in my bedroom, and this corally salmon colour in the living room," she pulls a blanket over her lap and tucks her feet under her bottom. "It's really bright, you'd probably need sunglasses."

[Deleted]

He heads to the electric fireplace, flicking it on. A thin line of fire spreads out between glass panels, immediately breathing some warmth into the place. "Gothic Green? Dark walls seem to be all the rage these days," he says, finding it hard to believe these words are leaving his mouth. He sits down in an armchair, knowing it's the one piece of furniture that doesn't resist you when you sit on it. "Yeah, sounds like you. How have you been?"

[athena mccarthy]

Her eyes follow him as he moves around the room, "it's bright though. Green with a little teal." She sips slowly; the wine tastes full, even and definitely expensive. Her long body finds a place of comfort in the couch and her hand holds the wine glass so loosely it threatens to spill with one accidental bump. "I thought we'd covered that? Flossing my way through a pandemic?"

[Deleted]

The women in the huge prints look drab next to Athena as she reclines on his couch, holding the glass dangerously loosely. He frowns slightly but resists the urge to remind her of the furnishings, knowing he'd sound like an asshole. "Oh yeah. Well, you seem well. Must be all that flossing."

[athena mccarthy]

She narrows her eyes at Julian, daring him to tell her off as she rocks the wine glass between her fingers. "Yes, and online fitness classes. I've got a solid burpee routine," she looks outside at the landscape of windows, all aglow with a yellow warmth. "Are you okay then?"

[Deleted]

He's tense, as he practically always his, his shoulders tight with it. He's not sure why she's here, she doesn't seem particularly enthusiastic about seeing him but then he hasn't forgotten all the barbed things he had said not so long ago. "I almost got a Peloton, but I would have hated myself too much at that point." He finishes his wine, leaving the empty red stained glass on the floor beside where he's sat. "I'm good. Solitude suits me."

[athena mccarthy]

Athena scrunches her freckled nose at the idea of a stationary bike, "I'm glad you didn't. Such an eyesore." There's so much tension in the air that she wants to run out to escape it. She takes a deep breath and pulls the air into her lungs in attempt to breathe her anxiety away. "C'mon, I think even the most introverted people must be going nuts," she follows his lead and polishes off the wine, "the beard looks good. Scruffy you is my favourite."

[Deleted]

He drags his eyes from her, instead focusing on the fire as it licked its way up the glass. He often sat and watched the fireplace, lost in his thoughts or trying to figure out a particular sticking point in a case. He's glad he thought to put the music on, as the silence between them would have been suffocating without. He scratches at the beard, forgetting he had it. He's not too sure how scruff you can really be in sweatpants that cost over a thousand dollars, but he feels the warmth of the compliment regardless. "It's just laziness," he says, glancing at her empty glass. "Do you want a top up?"

[athena mccarthy]

"Well, laziness suits you," she smiles and looks down into her glass, "no, I'll pace myself." For a while the days had really blended into each other and she'd lost the in between of one glass and a whole bottle. She knew that she would drink through the remaining glasses like a kid on grape juice and her filter would begin to fall. "I think if I drink I'll get loose," she laughs awkwardly, "body, words, everything."

[Deleted]

"I know you do," he says, finally cracking a smile. "OK, no more wine, I've got work tomorrow anyway." He thinks of having to heave himself out of bed tomorrow, of having to put on a shirt and tie and jacket though he's only joining via Zoom. He wants this evening to last as long as possible, and with how tense things are in this moment, he's done a good job of making time stand still. He looks at her, his eyes meeting hers properly. "I'm sorry I was rude about you."